I’ve been through a lot with my mental health these past several months, and I’m only just coming out the otherside from it. I’m not ready to talk about it that much, but know that it was tough and every day felt like a mountain to climb. I wasn’t sleeping or eating well for weeks but each day I’d find myself getting a little better and that got me through.
Since those days, I’ve realised fear held me back for a long time. There are things I would love to do that now I don’t want anything to hold me back. There are still restrictions though, thanks to COVID-19, so I have to wait to do quite a few things (hello travel!), but once things are back to some semblance of normal I want to take to the helm and chart new journeys for myself.
So this week’s poem is all about my fears and worries and how they held me back, but no longer. I’m going to feel the fear and do it anyway – including writing poetry and blog posts, sharing my thoughts and ideas with the world.
I hope you like the poem!
I feel it tightening
A noose around my neck
This fear of mine is incandescent
A tortured flame at my beck
I shout out a word
But no one can hear my call
I keep the words silent on my lips
Trying to travel through this squall
But I know my strengths now
As I wander this road alone
No one can walk it for me
Each new step I see I’ve grown
Tell me all will be ok
That this time will surely pass
All the worries deep inside
Appear and yet speed by so fast
I brush away an invisible hair
Feel the wind pin pricking my cheeks
I take another stand here
And walk these endless peaks
Because I’ve found my path this time
It stretches wide and far
I do not listen to endless whispers
I do not hear them anymore
There’s a lesson I say to be learned
A tale that all parents tell
That a life is only measured
By the fears we each will quell
I take to the open road
Despite the worries plaguing inside
I have let them win for far too long
There’s a new life that I have spied.